Trump’s online store has much more than 2028 campaign hats
Earlier this week, President Donald Trump unveiled a new line of presidential swag, including a bright red cap emblazoned with the words “Trump 2028.” Pundits and journalists honed in on the new swag immediately, as the president and his allies have previously alluded to poking at presidential term limits. In March, Trump said he was “not joking” about a third term, citing unspecified “methods” for winning another term in the White House.
The hat, dropped unceremoniously on the Trump Organization’s official store with the description “break the rules,” runs for a whopping $50, which doesn’t include the cost of the potential constitutional crisis it opens up.
Americans are well aware of Trump’s touted business acumen, but some might know that the now iconic red baseball cap is simply the tip of a vast merchandising iceberg, with the official Trump store a veritable treasure trove of questionably branded objects.
Presidential merch is extremely common and there are items that make sense for the Trump brand, given its longstanding place in the world of hospitality — pickleball paddles and golf accessories, for example, and the Trump Organization’s Mar-a-Lago line, which includes unsurprising array of resort logo robes and slippers.
But then there’s some truly fascinating listings (among, let’s be clear, hundreds of products). Fine jewelry featuring presidential motifs? Or maybe a Trump candle is more your vibe? Mother’s Day creeping up on you and still giftless? Visit the Trump store’s Mother’s Day gift guide (maybe mom would appreciate MAGA stud earrings?).
If you have a few spare minutes (read: an entire afternoon) to scroll through every listing, don’t! We’ve picked out some highlights below.
Trump sweets
Credit: TrumpStore
Movie night lovers and candy aficionados can stock up by shopping the Trump Sweets line, which definitely don’t appear to be the same wholesale repackaged candy that TikTok creators peddle to millions on livestreams everyday.
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Trump brand coffee
Credit: TrumpStore
When I slither out of bed in the morning, dreading my daily news scroll, nothing can help me wake up quicker than a mug of Trump-branded gold roast coffee, made in America at the Albemarle Estate at Trump Winery. “Locally sourced java for Big Thinking.”
Trump EarPods
Credit: TrumpStore
“Add a touch of luxury” to your daily music listening, reads the product listing for these golden Trump earbuds that cost only $35. The specs? Fast pairing, rechargeable, 2-3 hours of music and talk, Trump logo.
Trump USB drive
Credit: TrumpStore
If I’m looking to store some precious family photos or international war plans, I am definitely NOT going to upload them to a cloud service or an encrypted messaging app full of investigative journalists. Instead, I will store them on my trusty gold bar Trump USB drive!
‘USA bear’ clothing line and plushies
Credit: TrumpStore
The official store boasts dozens upon dozens of pieces of attire, including official MAGA merch lines, Mar-a-Lago swag, and other America-themed outfits. And I would be remiss to leave out the store’s only exclusive designer collection: Lara Trump’s own line of athleisure wear.
However, it’s the “USA Bear” line that really stands out. Who can afford a real Ralph Lauren bear crewneck in this economy? Give me USA Bear any day.
Trump flag wrapping paper
Credit: TrumpStore
American flags aren’t just for the Fourth of July people! They work great for birthdays, anniversaries, and even Christmas gifts, as is proven by the stunning pattern on Trump’s own presidential wrapping paper.
Trump beach set
Credit: TrumpStore
Families will be flocking to the beach and setting up lakeside this spring and summer, especially as our planet is increasingly warmed by our ongoing climate crisis. A classic sand bucket and beach ball, sporting the all-caps Trump marquee, would be the perfect addition.
Trump skincare
Credit: TrumpStore
A little self care never hurt anyone. So throw on your Trump rose chemise slip, light up your Trump incense, and indulge in the Trump store’s polish and plump skincare offering from brand HydroPeptide, strangely, one of the only third-party products on the site.
It’s okay, though, the store has a Trump (ignore the EOS resemblance) brand lip balm.